Well, a brief blog tonight. Some of you will have prayed for me today! Please don’t worry if you haven’t. Don’t feel remotely accused! However, because I shared in a blog yesterday that I was going for routine tests today, I know from responses that some of you did pray and probably more than let me know. Two precious friends also prayed with me this morning. How blessed I am! I cannot think of any greater blessing than knowing you are being prayed for by somebody somewhere. Thank you! Well, God was indeed with me in my visit to the hospital for the said tests. I know He always is but He helped me to be tangibly aware of His presence, which doesn’t happen to me every day. It was precious.
I find these regular breathing tests remind me that all is still not right with my lungs, so on the day when they come around yet again, I do feel a bit vulnerable. The amount of breathing in and out I have to do as various measurements and volumes etc are taken, make me feel quite tired and a bit shaky. Well, they did so again today, but right at the point I was aware of the onset of that weakness and the feeling of fragility that goes with it, I was very aware of the presence of God; His powerful and yet gentle presence. I wondered if I was imagining it. Fortunately that wondering was not judged as unbelief, as the same blessing came again 5 seconds later. The sense of tiredness and weakness still persisted, but the felt love of God toward me was so reassuring.
I know that God was yet again showing me what has probably been my most oft repeated message in these blogs; that you and I can find His presence in weakness. I am saying nothing new in this blog and yes, I know all believers in Christ know that truth in theory, but I can share through the experience not just of today but of the last year or two that it is really really true. My good and godly friend Rev. David Malcolm shared a dream with me on Monday, part of which was God just running His hand through my hair in a reassuring way. When he told me that on Monday morning, I felt the same presence as I felt today. I think despite many opportunities, I am still learning what I have been learning for months. Maybe it takes time to learn some precious truth; maybe I am a slow learner; maybe it just takes time to learn to walk a new path; just maybe it is to become my new main message to share in days to come, however that sharing happens.
I leave you these words from Psalm 139 verse 5, which I love. Perhaps you should read them a few times and think about them in the private place of your own heart:
“You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing upon my head.”
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