One of these “word for somebody” things: Hard to explain but I just have a knowing in my knower when certain things I share are something above and beyond me sharing….
You are feeling a disatisfaction with the way you preach. You know you have a skill to skim stones across the surface of the water, across the surface of a text, a skill that brings laughter and admiration from those who watch you, but you long for more.
I believe God would say that your skimming stones has blessed people, brought life and happiness, but the disatisfaction you feel does indeed come from Him. It is not there to make you dismiss all your preaching to date as failure. Lightness of touch is not wrong. It can and does bless people and some could learn that touch from you to their benefit and to the benefit of the flock entrusted to their care. Rather, your dis-ease is there as God’s invitation to take others into the waters that you yourself have tasted but held back from ministering in.
You have been on deeper waters yourself and looked into them with awe.You have glimpsed limitless love, limitless power, limistless wisdom, limitless faithfulness, a limitless unfaltering purposefulness, and never altering righteousness and holiness and mercy. You have met with God. “We speak of what we know.” Speak of what you know of the unchanging God of the Bible who is the God of your experience too.
God got you on to these waters. He can get others there too. Just be a witness to speak of what you have seen and heard. Speak of what you know…. it will help some to long to swim where they cannot feel ground beneath their feet, to siwm in a place where they cannot feel or see an edge or bank to hold on to, to be in an open sea, where they are aware of movement around them and underneath them over which they have no control and is beyond their knowledge.
Some are longing for that place where they are out of their depth in God. They need to hear from you that their longing is not a longing after a spiritual fantasy that does not exist. Tell them such a place is there, a place where your only hope of surviving and living in God is God Himself who draws near in Jesus Christ.