Posted earlier in Facebook:

Tricks of the trade for Sundays for peopled out pastors.

1. Pick up a bunch of papers and walk around the church complex. Folk will think you are busy and are looking for someone and should not interrupt you. Drawback: if the church complex is small people will notice that you have come in and out the same room 16 times.

2: There is always the loo to hide in. Drawback: Pastoral sensitivity. You will soon become aware there are others whose need to sit where you are sitting is urgent.

3: Lock yourself in your church office if you have one, keep the lights off and stay very quiet indeed. Drawback: 96 people have convinced the Property Convener they have a legitimate need for a key to your office.

Tricks of the trade for pastoral visits may follow at some time, but for now, let me just say that when you end a visit with a prayer that God will bless “His child” it is a bit of a giveaway that for the life of you, you cannot remember the name of the person you have been visiting.

God Bless you on day 1. Only 39 years and 364 days to go….

Kenny